they say you can't always win at cards and i certainly know this to be very true. i've had my ups and downs with the game just like every one else. i've built small bankrolls of $50-$100 into not much bigger bankrolls of $800-$900......then the deck goes cold, i can't win a race, the suckouts abound and before you know it i'm back down to my original roll. it's sooooo frustrating. you're still playing well, you're not on tilt, you're still getting cards................but you lose, lose, lose, lose, lose. it can literally make you feel like you are the worst card player on the planet. it'll ruin your day. maybe your week and month. it's ruined my day before, more than once or twice. it's the worst feeling in the world to me. that sounds exaggerated, but for me it's not. i really don't think people that don't play cards or people that don't take the game seriously can possible comprehend what i'm saying here either.
here's a conversation i had the other night with a friend of mine who was in vegas:
monday night 9:15pm CST:
friend: "i'm killing a 4-8 w/ kill game at orleans"
me: "sweet. i love limit because it's usually people that don't have the knowledge or cash to play NLHE"
friend: "yeah, a lot of people seeing flops for jackpot, i'm raising my hands building pots"
tuesday afternoon 4:43pm CST:
me: "how did you end up doing last night?"
friend: "hate vegas. hate poker. gold cold decked and couldn't scoop a pot. just a bummer."
**not an uncommon conversation to have with friends concerning cards. only a card player understands that when you are UP and running well..........you DO NOT leave the table. being is up is not a reason to leave. cold decks, better players, bad table image, being on tilt........those are reasons to leave. sometimes playing cash games, which is rare for me, i over the course of 20-30 minutes can literally and clearly see that the deck has gone cold for me. so i cash out. never leave when you are running the table and crushing the game. that, in essence, is you losing money. because you're leaving dead money behind that should be flowing into your pocket.**
me....i'm a highly emotional person. i wish i wasn't, but i am. my highs are STUPID high and my lows......well, they are lower than most of my good mates realize because i don't let them see them (my counselor suggested more than once that i should look into some sort of drug that would balance me out so these swings aren't so drastic, like cards oddly enough, but i said no, more than once). there's no real purpose served to let people see that side of me. and of course lately........with the cards at least.......things have been good for me. so life feels great. tomorrow it might just suck badly, but today it's grand.
which brings me back to the whole "heat" thing. i cashed in 1st last night AGAIN at the tuesday night $40 rebuy. my opponent at heads up only wanted to chop the money if i gave him an extra $20, so i said "no thanks". then about 20 minutes later he wants to chop when i get him 2-1 in chips. i said no. a few hands later he asks again about chopping, but this time he said he would give ME an extra $50. i said no. i told him that i offered a chop when we got HU and he wouldn't chop it 50/50, so now we shall play it out. like in most cases there was a small voice in the back of my head that said i should chop and not take a chance, BUT this guy i knew i could beat. i had gotten him off better hands earlier in the night already. i open shoved from the small blind once with K9 clubs when it had folded around to me. i had to ship my whole stack because i felt 100% it was a big enough stack to get him off a weak A or any hand that wasn't very strong. the big blind sits there agonizing over if should call me or not. he could have won an oscar for his performance. finally after about 2 minutes of thinking about it (he was really concerned about risking 60-70% of his stack on this hand....which is EVERYTHING at this stage of the tourney) he OPEN folds 88. i chuckled on the inside and told him "good fold". the even sicker part is the dealer, in her hand, burned a card and delt the flop to see it: AK3. his fold, in my opinion, was a bad fold, but lucky for him he didn't call. my biggest strength at this tuesday night game is that very few of the players know how to use their stack sizes deep in the tourney. they all like to limp, so when i wake up with a good hand i punish them by, usually, shoving. any raise less than that won't work. they'll call a raise even if it leaves them with 500 in chips, but they WON'T call a raise if it puts them all in. yeah, i know, it makes NO sense at all. to leave yourself with no chips to work with is the same as being all in. some disagree with me, but that's just how i see it. if you don't have enough chips to move someone off their weak or medium weak hand then you're short stacked. heck, one hand last night i shoved with KJ hearts and the fella to my right limped. table folded back around to him and he open folded A6 hearts. dude had me CRUSHED, but he folded because made him decide for his tourney life on that one hand. once again, i chuckled inside and told him VERY VERY good fold. he believe me too......which still cracks me up right now. the key to my winning over there is when i DO have to show a hand it's strong and it usually wins.
i keep telling myself i can't keep cashing there every week......but i do. every. single.week. and for the record i'm not cashing solely because i'm getting killer cards. sometimes i do get good cards at just the right time. everyone needs that to happen to make a profit at the tables. of course there are some weeks where i am lucky enough to have a decent stack because i have to fold for an hour sometimes and that's a lot of blinds. i'm cashing because i have a good line on these players. i know which ones play which way. i know the tight ones (so when they raise i usually get out of the way) and i know the ones that chase to no end with bad hands. finally last night when the game was over someone said "yeah, he cashes every week". well, here's to hoping those fellas don't get better and i cash there..........every. single. week. right now that room is paying all my bills and if i take down sunday for first place cash..........london is PAID for in full and i might go sooner than planned, but most likely not as there's a big series i want to play in early october at the fox poker club.
NOW i just have to get a good line on room #2 that's close to the house. those older fellas are NOT easy to play against and if i can figure them out and cash there semi regularly then life would be sweet. i couldn't go to the WSOP once again this year, but i DO NOT care what it takes...........in 2012 i AM going and i AM going to make money. just watch me. and unlike most i could care less about a bracelet. i am there for the money. not to get rich, but to make enough to afford me freedom in life. to travel, to eat well, to travel..........to play cards. i will not be a slave to work and life. it won't happen. i've lived far too long without a day job to EVER go back. i can't.